Hello Friends.

Did you know that I make stuff out of wood?  Things like tables and lamps and paintings?

No Scrap Left Behind Lamp

I use reclaimed wood from the dumpster or Habitat for Humanity or from people’s remodeling jobs.  I also love to use wood that Coleman and my BFF, Thor and I actually mill from trees that have fallen prey to our dreadful Texas drought.  Actually, sometimes they’ve just died from old-age, too.  Because they do just die of old-age sometimes.  I remember when I first heard that and let it digest.  Of course they would just have a life span like any other creature, but I never really had thought about it before.

Anyway, I love to make things out of wood.  I went to Austin Community College and studied woodworking for a number of semesters.  I even took some welding there.  I also apprenticed with the delightful and fun Mark Macek a couple of years ago.  I’ve even gone to Maine to study at the Center for Furniture Craftsmanship.  I make stuff in class, on my own and with Thor.  I am very much hoping to go in with some people on a warehouse space soon, so that we can have our own woodworking shop.

In addition to the furniture, I use smaller scraps of wood for lamps and for my pet portraits (Likeness Not Guaranteed ©).  Commissions are totally available and the price is quite reasonable.  Especially since you’re getting a hand-crafted work of art.  Which may or may not look like your pet.  I am trying to capture the soul of your beloved animal and am, in fact, an untrained artist.  However, no one has asked for their money back yet, which I take as a very good sign.

Soul has been properly captured

Another satisfied customer

I have painted many dachsunds.

Anyhow, the purpose of my even telling you all about this is because I’m going to get to show my stuff at East Austin Studio Tour this year!!  Yes!!  Amazing!!  A dream come true!!!  For real.  Why?  Because it was at East Austin Studio Tour a few years ago that I got the idea in my head to really pursue woodworking.  My BFF, Thor and I were visiting Mark Macek’s studio and he had a woman apprentice and I thought, “Wow, women get to do this?  I really want to do this.”  So I asked Mark what it would take for me to get to help him out some day and he told me to go take some classes and so I did.  Thor had been encouraging me and then there was Mark being all sweet, too, and so I just jumped in.  And the rest is history.

East Austin Studio Tour takes place over the course of the second and third weekend in November.  You get on your bike and you bike all over the east side snooping around in people’s actual work spaces, talking and asking questions and getting super inspired.  If you’ve done it you know what I mean.  If you haven’t done it I highly suggest that you check it out this year.  You don’t have to do it by bike but it really is the most fun that way, I think.

So, this year I get to actually be in the darn thing.  Jennifer Chenowith at Fisterra Studio has generously invited me to show at her awesome home.  And my band, Gretchen’s Disco Plague (It’s Infectious!) is going to play in her backyard on Sat. November 10th for free.  You can go look at art all day and then after the tour is over my band is going to kick back with some improvised tunes for your musical enjoyment.  So come on out in November and talk with me and lots of other Austin artists.  It really is a special event.

Recycling is the most inspiring.

And yes, I do really live on the east side.  Since 1985.

Crazy juxtapositions are commonplace

Ann and I went to Berlin for almost a week.  I enjoyed it last time and I enjoyed it again this time.  I find it to be a nice break from the homogeneity of the architecture of Paris.

Where am I?

Yes, call me a tasteless Philistine.  Go ahead.  Well, on second thought, don’t actually call me one to my face but you can certainly think it privately.  I don’t know, I just have trouble with towns where all the buildings look the same.  I absolutely adore Toronto, but the architecture of that town also makes me feel strangely strangled and claustrophobic.  You know how some songs have these long, repetitious outros?  Like Hey Jude and that Simon & Garfunkel song that goes, “Lie la Lie (crash) Lie la Lie Lie Lie Lie Lie, Lie la Lie (crash) etc.”?  For my entire life that has absolutely driven me crazy.  I remember being in a pizza parlour playing the jukebox as a child in Clear Lake City and just going insane with misery as those songs just kept repeating themselves the same way over and over and over again.  Unfortunately I can get that way about architecture, too.

In the square, next to the pan pipes

But this writing is not to denigrate towns.  No, this is to praise them.  The reason why there are so many new buildings in Berlin (and so many buildings that look old but are, in fact, new but built to look old) is very sad.

Gorgeous synagogue

The legacy of war is never far from you as you walk around there.  It’s really quite amazing to reflect upon how relatively recently all of that, and of course the wall, were.  But the damn town has dusted itself off and just keeps on moving.  There’s something very vibrant about it.  I really like it.  It’s absolutely covered in graffiti but it still feels clean.  It is not covered in dog feces and man urine like Paris is.  I got to hear so many birds singing, just like back in Austin.  What a pleasure to get to hear bird songs again.  I have no idea why the birds sing louder in Berlin, but they certainly do.  Maybe because they have so many parks everywhere?

My favorite graffiti

A really funny and unexpected thing that happened there was the Germans’ utter confusion over my name.  I would introduce myself and they would be mystified as if I’d said, “my name is Goeiurawoienrpaoweirkm.”  “What is your name?” they would ask with a quizzical look on their face and I would try to be helpful and pronounce it all, “Gray-chee-in” and then to my surprise, that would not help matters any and then finally I would pull out my driver’s license and show them and they would say, “Oh, Gretchen!  Like in Faust.  OK.  OK.  Yes.  That is not a woman’s name, that is what we would call a child.”  For real, I got this over and over again.  Apparently this common-in-Texas name is uncommon-in-Germany for females out of grade school.  I have a child’s name.  Call me Greta.  That’s the grown-up version.

They have this photogenic TV tower that no one can ever get enough pictures of.  This thing has a total “It” factor.

Fernsehturm (TV Tower)

Moody and picturesque

When you go out to eat in Paris it is expensive and the portion is not Texas-sized.  When you go out to eat in Berlin it is cheap and it’s pretty darn massive.  And what does Berlin really love?  Italian.  Everywhere you look there are Italian restaurants.  And everywhere you look there are pharmacies that carry Dr Hauschka, Weleda, Lavera and other brands I’ve never heard of to take care of your body and facial care needs.  And for considerably less than you’d pay in the US.  However, then you have to get them home.  And if you’re anything like me, you have already packed your heavy ass bag to the gills.

Ghost bike

They also have lots of bikes in Berlin.  I am always happier in a biking town.  But if you must take a taxi, why not just hop into one of the many Mercedes Benz model of taxis that Berliners use to get around in?  Seriously.  Mercedes cabs.  I quite enjoyed the one cab ride I took.  The Berlin Biennale was happening so we went to a number of art openings.  They were kindof punk rock and really nicely political.  Oh, and for better or for worse, English is spoken a great deal in Berlin.  Even the signs for the Biennale were in English.  This year’s slogan was, “Forget Fear.”  I like that.

Also, they have good coffee.  And it’s cheap.

Lomo plus overexposure = arty

But honestly, I was completely captivated by how photogenic I find that town.  You can take a photo of a building from so many different angles and in so many different relationships to other buildings.  I went out and spent the money on a Lomo camera.  I have been eyeing them for years because I love an arty looking photo.  And then when the iPhone got the Hipstamatic app, well now it’s quite easy to get that Holga look.  But I don’t have an iPhone.  And I’d rather not get one just for an app I can put on the camera.  And I do love analogue devices.  So I broke down and got a Diana Mini and now my daughter and my money go to the photo lab down the street.  I’m still in the midst of a steep learning curve with this thing.  But I do love it.  I look forward to getting good at B&W portraits.  All my life I’ve wanted to take good B&W portraits.  Buildings and people, that’s what I got it for.

Lastly, I have been mostly vegetarian these last few months.  The Island of Dr. Moreau sets me off on a regular basis and I just get so full of compassion that I cannot stomach meat.  However, I can break this fast, too.  And I love me some sausage.  I had a few sausage bites in Berlin that almost made me break down and cry they were so delicious.  I felt truly like a Texan.  Like a Texan named Gretchen with German roots, (which I am).  I just knew in those moments of enjoying those spicy, greasy bites that everyone in my family would agree that that was some tasty sausage.  I suddenly felt so linked to them in a good way.

I love these buildings

It's been cold here, obviously.

Ann and I are living in Paris.  Have you ever been here?  It has a crazy layout.  It was not designed as a grid.  The streets all radiate out in angles and they change their name a lot.  Also, Blvd Saint-Michel is not the same street as Place du Saint-Michel nor Quai Saint-Michel, although they are all pretty much in the same location.  I tend to not pay attention enough.  I tried to figure out how to write that sentence another way that is more flattering to myself, but I can’t.  I just don’t pay enough attention to where I’m going and I get lost and confused and frustrated.  There is no 14^th street followed by 15^th street.  But there is Blvd Poissonniere which intersects with Rue du Faubourg Poissonniere, so don’t try to just remember the salient “Poissonniere” part because they are two very different streets.  So I am getting to learn about frustration and slowing down and paying attention and letting go.  Again.  And again.

After Stockholm I realized that I just needed to slow the hell down when I’m out walking.  What’s my hurry?  I’m already in Paris.  So, that has been a revelation.

Giant mushroom at the Pompidou.

Also, becoming a member of the Pompidou has been a revelation.  Again.  We were members when we were here eight years ago and loved it.  It’s so great to just be able to walk over to a totally interesting modern art museum and stay for as little time as I want because I’m a member and I don’t need to take it all in in one day.

Handmade books at the Pompidou.

The stuff at the Pompidou always gives me great ideas.  For example, eight years ago I saw these little artist’s books on display there.  They were by Kandinsky or Debussy or someone unexpected like that.  It inspired me to make a little book of my own as a project to occupy my time while in Paris.  I made up a bunch of copies and handed them out to my friends once I returned to the US that summer.  My pal Melissa York called me up after receiving hers and said that she had a vision that I should read from this book between singing my songs solo whilst wearing a black leotard and a white men’s button up.  And thus my solo show concept was born.  Inspired by a trip to the Pompidou.

Revolution, expensive cashmere style NOW!!!!

I am also very inspired, and I don’t know why, by the many prostitutes of Rue Saint Denis.  I googled that street and discovered that it has been a street of commerce and prostitution since at least the middle-ages.  Whoah. Whoah. Whoah.  Those women are out there all afternoon, standing in doorways and people are just bustling past them on the very narrow sidewalks, going about their garment district business.  There are mostly wholesale clothing stores on that street that display outrageously gorgeous garish clothing that Ann and I want to buy so badly but it’s not for sale to us.  But if these clothes are indicating what’s going to be in stores for spring this year, let me just say that I’m quite excited.  It’s one great disco outfit after another.  And I love how gaudy French fashion can be.  For example, I’m looking for a crockpot to cook in.  The water here is very hard and it takes forever for beans to cook.  And I found a tempting, bejeweled one.

Slow cooking in style

The people of Paris love to make out in public.  Doesn’t matter how old or young they are, they’re just  hot for each other.  Paris Is For Lovers and don’t you forget it.  They won’t let you forget it.  They will remind you every time you get on the subway, or wait in line for a movie or simply walk down the street.  Why is this?  Why are they so horny?  Is it because everywhere you go there are naked mannequins in the windows of stores?  I know this is a reach, but for real, check out a few of the photos I’ve snapped.  What is the purpose of naked mannequins in a clothing store window?  What are they selling?

Example 1

Example 2

Example 3

Example 4

Example 5

We have also been going out to hear bands: Wild Flag, St Vincent, Christine and the Queens and My Brightest Diamond.  I really enjoy Paris audiences.  Why?  They don’t talk thru the shows, for the most part.  They listen.  They sing along during the sing alongs.  They actually pay attention.  It’s a treat to be among them since I, too, enjoy being respectful of the artist during shows.  We need to be going to more French acts, too, not just the American ones.  There are also lots of International acts that come thru Paris and this is a great opportunity to see Kardes Turkuler, for example, who might not make their way to Austin.

Brave souls on the frozen fountain.

In general my enjoyment of life has improved since it warmed up a bit and I had my boots stretched by a professional.  They were too tight.  I have also been doing yoga on my own for the first time in my life.  Yoga in English is quite expensive here and my friend, Risa, introduced me to the notion of the yoga podcast which led me to downloading pose guides which has led me to just doing yoga on my own in my office.  Wow.  Maybe that’s why I’m here in Europe for five months.  To finally learn how to do yoga on my own.  I’ve been to enough classes.  Surely I can lead myself thru some stretching and release.  It’s been great.

What else is great here?  The cheese, the mechanical watches, the Roger Corman retrospective at le  Cinematheque Francaise, the flea markets, my neighborhood, dog shit aside, the number of dogs there are everywhere who are very well behaved and quite charming, cute Parisian kids with their adorable outfits and accents, ultra-compact paper towels made out of recycled paper, cobblestoned streets and history everywhere.  It can be overwhelming to me sometimes.  But now that I’m slowing down it’s making a big difference as far as taking it all in.

After the flea market.

I also love that there’s a karaoke style of busking here.  Someone just steps onto the metro with a portable karaoke machine on a cart and they burst into sincere song.  Usually it’s an evergreen like Besame Mucho or something mellow like that.  But I really wish that I had the guts to pursue my lounge side while in Paris and get myself one of these set ups and entertain the commuters with lounge versions of punk classics.  I think that would be so fun.

I Did It My Way

Did you enjoy the way I did it my way?

I’m excited to say that I have a couple of shows coming up here.  This great record store called Gals Rock puts on shows and they’ve been kind enough to work with me.  I have an in-store there on April 21 and then I get to do a big show with a band starring my beloved Aimee Norwich on June 1.  That will be at some venue that’s not the record store.  More information as it comes in.

Sights on the metro.

I’ve been doing a lot of drawing.  I bought The Dumpy Pocket Book of Nature because it was only 3 euros and who can resist that title?  It’s filled with little pen and ink drawings of animals and insects and plants and even the night sky.  I take my hot new Waterman fountain pen and badly recreate the drawings in this book and it gives me endless amounts of pleasure.  I miss woodworking, but it behooves me to work on my drawing skills.  So drawing is my new craft focus. Oh, and I bought this ‘60s French design magazine for 1 euro and am now making collages with my new little drawings of animals.  I’m thinking of making a set of cards out of them, or some such thing.

Busying myself with collage

I’ve also bought a couple of Scandinavian carving knives and I stole a piece of pine from a construction site and have been working on my carving, finger cutting and hand piercing skills.  Scary.  But addictive.

Adicto!

It's cold in Stockholm

We went to Stockholm in February and had a great time.  It’s a water city, water, water, water everywhere.  Gorgeous.  It was freezing cold but still so beautiful.  I loved the food very much.  Delicious, hearty bread.  I shouldn’t really eat very much bread, it hurts my stomach.  But this stuff was soooo tempting.  They also love their muesli covered in crazy Swedish berries and many different types of fermented milk products.  I had great coffee and also very tasty teas.

Our Lovely Hotel

We were staying at an old hotel right on the water called Hotel Diplomat.  I highly recommend this hotel if you’re staying in Stockholm.

Our hotel from across the water

Normally when a hotel offers free continental breakfast that is not a selling point for me.  And I was, as always, skeptical when I went down that first morning.  But my skepticism turned to ecstasy with my first cup of the special house blend Hotel Diplomat tea with an earl grey base supplemented with other mysterious but fantastic flavors.  Oh, why didn’t I buy some while I was there?  I could have taken some Hotel Diplomat home with me.

The remnants of deliciousness.

Anyway, Stockholm speaks more English than Paris does.  Which is good for me because I haven’t bothered to learn anything but English and some Spanish.  I walked around in the freezing cold every day, looking at textile, ceramic and furniture design.  They have a gorgeous park filled with really cool museums.  At one museum I bought a Swedish carving knife, inspired by an account in James Krenov’s A Cabinetmaker’s Notebook about the importance of owning a good Swedish carving knife.  Now I own one.

Did I mention that it was cold?

They also have a lot of department stores, as does Paris.  I grew up going to department stores in Houston and I have a lot of fond memories of them.  And these European department stores are much more like the ones in my memories than the malls that have replaced them in the US.  I wandered all around in them, looking at the furnishings and the fancy foods and the pricey but handsome clothes.

The famous department store called PUB.

Did you know that Stockholm really loves their 7-11’s?  I feel like Texas has way fewer 7-11’s than when I was growing up. It was really my first convenience store.  7-11 and then U-Totem and then Stop & Go.  Anyway, it looks like they just moved those Texas 7-11s over to Stockholm and sortof snazzed them up.  They sell incredibly good-looking packaged sandwiches and an assortment of fancy baked goods, the likes of which we would never see in a 7-11 in the US.

7-11 deliciousness......who knew?

They sell a lot of candy in bulk at the 7-11.  Weird things like gummy teeth and licorice covered in salt.  They have bins that are just open right in the middle of the store where everyone just puts their grimy hands in to get their candy.  Personally, I was not tempted.  But my traveling companion was.  And she never got sick, so I guess it was ok.

Stockholm also loves to put their food in a tube so that you just squeeze it out on that wasa cracker, or onto their delicious bread.  Our US dollar doesn’t go very far over there and we were looking for something to eat in a grocery store that was under $15 and came across these tubes of vegetables that looked promising.  Then Ann figured out that it was baby food.  We didn’t buy any.  But I swear I saw a woman walking down the street in Paris the other day sucking on one of these Swedish tubes of pureed vegetables.

Street scene

Sweden somehow kick-started something inside of me about this European adventure that I’m on for five months.  Last year my beloved and old(ish) cat stopped grooming herself.  Her hair got all matted and dirty and the vet informed me that sometimes cats do this and that I needed to have her shaved.  Shaving her was a traumatic experience as it reminded me of when my dad had his glorious Santa Claus ‘fro shaved due to his chemo.  But actually, my cat’s fur felt amazingly soft once she was shaved.  And she looked very sleek, and kindof like a cross between a dog and a lion.  And of course her fur grew back.  And then it was like the shaving had just hit the re-set button and she was right back to grooming herself all the time like she always had before.

My darling angel who has changed my life for the better.

That’s how the Stockholm trip was for me.  It hit the re-set button and now I’m really into being here in Europe.  I’m looking at the textile, ceramic and furniture design of Paris.  Because, hell, they have a ton of it!  There is plenty to look at here!  I’m eating out more.  I’m walking more slowly thru the city streets.  I’m accepting that I’m here in a foreign country, freezing, while it’s spring back in Austin.  I miss the cats and biking and woodworking and my Austin friends and family tremendously.  But there is some reason why I’m over here.  And I just need to slow the hell down and let it reveal itself.  I get anxious when I don’t know the answer to everything.  But I just don’t know the answer to everything, so it’s time I started getting used to the fact of that.

Front of our apartment

Paris makes me use the internet more.  This happened last time we were here.  I was on Friendster quite a bit.   Now I want to actually write about my experiences and observations about this place.  Perhaps that’s what is meant by “blog.”  I’ve always been afraid of that concept and word, but now I’m just going for it.

Kitchen table view

I don’t actually think that this is the most beautiful city in the world or anything.  It’s just not quite my style.  I like the ruins of Rome, how every building looks like it’s faux finished and then I’m like, oh yeah, this is what faux finish is based on.  I like that more than this orderly wrought iron.  That said, there are a lot of great things here.  I am definitely at a disadvantage because I don’t speak French, but whose fault is that?  I should have bothered to learn more.  Anyway, I spend all day exploring and here are some of the things I’ve noticed.

- There’s a subway car (Metro) pretty much every 3 minutes.  They aren’t long cars but they are very frequent.  It’s so nice to never really wait.  I have a monthly pass that cost me something like $67.  Add 30% plus exchange rate and the 1% Visa attaches to everything and that adds up to be a pretty expensive card.  But it’s so pleasant and convenient and they sell hot pain au chocolate in the station.  Not suspicious churros covered in Saran Wrap.  No, hot fresh chocolate croissants right out of the oven.  Now that’s nice.

- Cheese, fennel, the most delicious mustard in the world and Belgian endive are soooooo cheap here. That fancy grey salt you pay so much for at Whole Foods?  Two euros for a big bag. But, for some reason, baking soda is pricey.

Maille mustard display

- Check-out lines are not fast.  These cashiers are not at all concerned with speed.  They are sitting down and they are taking their sweet time.  All of them.  Not sure what I think about that.

- It’s a big city full of uneven ground.  So you gotta look where you walk.  But you don’t want to look where you walk because the contents of every dog’s bowels and every phlegmatic’s lungs are on display on the sidewalk every two inches.  It is really gross.  Grosser than NYC, even.  Certainly way grosser than Austin.

Also right outside the front door

- The coffee here is merely adequate.  But the tea is divine.  They really have their tea down! Giant leaves that plump up so nicely in the basket and impart the freshest flavor.  And for not a lot of money.  London is such a teabag town.  Paris is fantastic loose tea at a reasonable price.

- They have really cute little cars.  They even have electric cars that are somehow for rent on the street.  Like I said, I don’t understand French.  But they’ve got MG Midgets (which are so tiny) and other adorable foreign vehicles that are interesting and small.  And lots of cool motorcycles with giant windshields that come with a blanket to spread out on your lap.  As well as this citywide commuter bike rental thing where you put in a bankcard and you can unlock a cool looking bike that’s free for the first 30 minutes.  But the stinky car exhaust smell is a lot worse now than it was when we were here eight years ago.

Gorgeousness abounds

- OMG, the stationary stores!  Can we talk?!  They love their paper and their envelopes and their fountain pens here.  I never get tired of looking at the gorgeous assortment available on practically every city block.  They have tons of these envelopes I’m in love with that you just can’t get back in the States.  At least, I can never find them.  And they’re 70 cents here.  They have fountain pens, real fountain pens (plume) for 3 euros!  And the best paper for writing on with a fountain pen.  It’s such a pleasure.  In addition to using the internet a lot, I’ve been writing and drawing a lot, too.  If only Austin had just one of these stores.  They have so many of them here.  Surely Paris could spare one Gibert Jeune.

-Style-wise things have really changed since we lived here eight years ago.  The ladies have, thankfully, loosened up.  Lots more grey hair, so I don’t stand out as much.  And fewer bows on everything.  Jesus, it was so hard to just find a regular girl to look at last time.  The French women just appeared hyper feminine in a way that was too frou-frou to be interesting to me.  Now they just look normal.  Good even.

- I was walking down this garment district street the other day and right there in the middle of the day I passed three prostitutes just standing outside of shops.  I was thrown off by the first one, she had on a fur coat and some fishnets and her leg was being displayed provocatively and I really didn’t know what to make of her.  Was there just some pretty, rich lady who’d gotten lost in this district and was waiting for her ride to show up with more of her clothes or something?  Then I passed another woman who was just standing outside of a shop displaying leg.  And when I passed the third one I realized what was going on.  If these women had been playing Parisian prostitutes in a movie you would have said it was too cliché and unbelievable.  And no one was paying any attention to them.  It was amazing.

These are my observations thus far.  It’s literally freezing here and I bought new boots that squeeze my feet to death.  But still, I’m out there pounding the pavement every day to soak up all that Paris has to offer that I can take.  I will, perhaps, keep you posted.

Eiffel tower at sunset

And here is the best news, we put this baby out on vinyl.  Oh yeah, that’s what I’m talking about, purple vinyl.  It’s kindof lavender, but also really more like purple.  But you get the picture.  Now actually hold the precious object in your hands!  Every LP comes with a download card, so you don’t have to digitalize each track, we’ve done that for you.  You can just put this baby onto your turntable and get your gay (or gay friendly) party started.  I love this record.  Big shout-out to Aimee Norwich who brilliantly produced it.  She put the flesh and the muscle and the hair onto the bare bones.  And another huge shout-out to Scott Anthony at the Viewing Room who mastered it.  This is my third project with Scott and I really love working with him.

So, how do you go about getting this release, you may ask?  It’s available on iTunes, Amazon, via my eStore at TheConnextion, all of the usual suspects for downloading music.  And if you want to buy the gorgeous vinyl you can hold in your hand and treasure for a lifetime, that is available thru my eStore at TheConnextion.  And people, this thing is not an expensive purchase.  It’s ridiculously affordable.  Why?  Because I’m nostalgic.  When I was young I tended to spend about $6 on new vinyl and sometimes I went way out on a limb and bought it for $10.  I have never gotten over those prices.  That’s how much this stuff costs in my mind.  So, due to the fact that I’m living in the past, you don’t actually have to pay current prices today.  $10 for the LP.  On purple vinyl.  Gorgeous art by Dave.  Here’s the inspiration:

So, what are you waiting for?  You don’t even have to move from this very device that you’re using to read this blog.  Technology today is incredible.  You used to have to drive to the record store.  Now you can just sit on your ass and download this puppy, or order the LP and start dancing and singing along.  We want you to enjoy our original disco anthems.  We’re very pleased with what we have to offer you this holiday season.

Guess what?  I’ve cooked up a merchandise deal!  I have never done this before, but I really like it.  You know how I have been making merchandise of various forms for a super long time?  Like for decades?  And that a whole lot of it is out-of-print and inaccessible?  Well, I decided to reissue one of my favorite T-shirt designs ever: the Two Nice Girls Heavy Meddle shirt that was all but unwearable back in the early ’90s due to the bullet-proof sheet of plastic silkscreen that made up the design.  It was uncomfortable and it made your chest sweat.

But chests will sweat no longer!  Now this shirt is super soft and the image is pliable.  And let’s talk about the image for a minute, shall we?  I asked Meg Hentges to please design a female skull on a sheet of flames and she did.  We know that the skull is female because of her eyelashes, lipstick and beauty mark.  Pure genius, Meg.  Plus there’s nothing like that crazy font that says, “I’m all doom and gloom and going to get Medieval on your ass.”  No, Two Nice Girls was not just a pretty folk band, ok?  People, I’m super psyched that this shirt is available again in a new and improved form.

You can buy one for $10, (which is $5 cheaper than it was in 1991.)  Or, you can buy two $10 CDs and get this shirt for free.  Yes, you heard me right.  And I have a bunch of sizes, including XXXL, so no one should be left out of this amazing offer.  Hmmmm, so which ones are the $10 CDs you may ask?  Gretchen Phillips Ministries Seitan Is Real, Phillips&Driver Togetherness, and my most recent solo release I Was Just Comforting Her. Excellent choices, all.

Here’s a merch deal that would make a mighty fine gift idea.  Just saying.

My dad, Paul Phillips

Thank you so much, Chepo Pena, my beloved webmaster!  And all-round good guy and rockstar/artist.  I needed an update on this puppy and once again he delivered the goods.  Let’s see how this plays itself out now.

Hello people, welcome to my world.  A hell of a lot has been happening in my life.  Changes big and small, glad and sad.  My father, Paul Phillips, died in November.  Dad taught me how to play stringed instruments.  He was always totally encouraging of my musical pursuits and he was very proud of me, even when he didn’t really understand the relentless lesbianism of my work.  Phillips&Driver’s Togetherness was his favorite album of mine.  He told me that there was nothing that he would change on it, high praise indeed coming from him.

My sister and I helped him go thru his chemo in 2010 and then we helped him go into hospice and then we helped him die.  It was amazing.  I’ve never really been afraid of dying before, but now I’m really not afraid.  I feel very lucky that I was there to witness it.  And it was also very exhausting.  And then in January I cleaned out his whole house which was super-filled with interesting stuff.  And that was also exhausting.

Phillips&Driver's New One!

In the midst of all of this David Driver and I have been putting the finishing touches on our new album, Disco Dance Party 2000. We are going to release it on colored vinyl!  And on download cards made out of recycled paper and sunflower seeds that you can plant in the ground once you’ve downloaded this awesome new baby!  And I am working on reissuing the next batch of out-of-print gems, like the first Girls in the Nose cassette.  But this time it won’t be on cassette.  It will be on one of the new forms of media.

I just returned to Austin from a month in NYC.  That was a lot of fun.  I had the immense pleasure of playing with Kay Turner again, ably assisted by the amazing Viva DeConcini in Brooklyn, NY.  That was a blast.  And damnit, people need to be able to hear that music again, or even for the first time.  I saw some people’s minds blown as we launched into Meat, Bite Me, and Starpower.  Kay Turner never gives less than 1,000,000%.

While in NY I went to an Alexander McQueen show (amazing), Louise Bourgeois, Normal Heart, Thurston Moore, Our Hit Parade, Justin Vivian Bond, Erin McKeown, Printed Matter, Uniqlo, Burlington Coat Factory, DJ Rekha on the pier in Brooklyn, Jennifer Miller’s newest crazy-thing, Holly Hughes and more stuff than I’ll be able to remember.  What a great town.  But noisy.  Oh so noisy.  It made living by the freeway in Austin seem quiet in comparison to all of the drunken revelers who haunt every single street in NY.

Now I’m back in Austin and it’s good to be here, even tho it’s one million degrees.

Had a fantastic show in College Station last night with my disco improv band Gretchen’s Disco Plague (It’s Infectious!).  One of the funnest shows I’ve ever had in my life.  I was grinning my head off.  We played for a group of media professors and they just got down and danced and sang and had a great time.  We created a moment, or several moments, really.  Then it was time for the bus to take them back to their conference hotel and they just soul trained out of the room.  Perfect.  I love professors so much.  You know that great thing that Jane Gallup said when asked her sexual preference?  She said, “Grad students.”  I’d say that my answer is professors.

We have some more Gretchen’s Disco Plague (It’s Infectious!) shows coming up and I couldn’t be happier.  It’ll be my first time playing at Cheer Up Charlie’s and my third time playing at the mighty Elysium.  A famous Austin venue that has changed hands many times since I’ve been here, but which once housed the club wherein I saw Sonic Youth on their amazing Sister tour.

I’m going back and forth to Houston all the time this Fall.  Because my dad is very sick.  OK, there, I’ve shared it.  With all the people of the world wide web.  My dad is sick and in hospice and I go hang out with him every week and we have fun and are close.  It’s pretty amazing to get to do this.  But it’s also hard.  It has taken a bite out of my furniture making and my job at IF+D.  But I’m doing really important work and this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, so I’m actually quite psyched about it.  But it’s a lot of work.  On many levels.

But what I really want to say is that the new Phillips & Driver album – Disco Dance Party 2000 – has been mastered and is close to hitting stores.  Except it won’t really hit stores, it will most likely hit the world wide web world of downloads with perhaps a very few actual copies of a document that you can hold in your hands being manufactured.  Oh, for the times they are a’changing.  Anywho, (I’ve never used that phrase before, but I did just really enjoy it), I’ll allegedly keep you posted about the progress of this magnificent new release that will hopefully get you dancing and will, in fact, actually change your life.

That’s it for now.  Gotta go get some sort of exercise.

I’m totally in love with my disco improv band: Gretchen’s Disco Plague (It’s Infectious!).  I have a great rotating cast of co-horts from way back in the day to only just yesterday, and we wear stylish outfits and make up songs on the spot.  I’ve long wanted to have this band and now that I do have it, um yeah….I did always want to have this.  It’s just so awesome to be inside of the creation of the music in this way.  Edgy.  I like that.  Does “edgy” not have an “e?”  Hmmmm, why not?  English is hard.

I actually tutored a 10 year old in long division today.  If only my parents could have seen that one, they wouldn’t have believed it.  I thought I did a great job, personally.  I was surprised.

I’ve been making furniture like crazy.  It’s just so awesome, people.  Talk about infectious.  I dream about sanding and making mortises and tenons and furniture design and just being in the middle of the process, I dream about it all of the time.  Of course, when I was a dishwasher I dreamt of washing dishes all the time.  So maybe it’s like that.  But whatever.  It’s super fun, super great.  I’ll post some more stuff as I complete it.  I can tend to be a bit of an 85% completer person instead of doing it all the way.  I’m working on that, tho.

I recorded a Sara Hickman song for the new Sara Hickman tribute album that she commissioned.  Why didn’t I think of that?  Oh yeah, I did.  Anyway I got to work with my beloved Rob Halverson again, the guy I made I Was Just Comforting Her with.  What a pleasure it was to be back in the studio with him.  Really reminded me of what I love about getting the chance to make music.

School is about to end and I couldn’t be happier.  I’m ready to have my life back.  School really takes up time, no one reminded me of that fact.

That’s all I can think of at the moment.  I’m sleepy.  I’m going to post this so I don’t feel like such a loser about never updating my website.  I do love this website, it’s not like I don’t.  I guess I’ve just been busy.

And you?  How are you?